Two Shall be One

 “And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?  So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” –Matthew 19:4-6

A marriage built on the strength of the Lord and the principles of love, grace, mercy, and servitude will endure.  The ratio of marriages that are ending in divorce is at an all-time high, and it is my belief that in every single case, you could trace the cause back to one of these areas.  There are situations of abuse, adultery, and addictions that come between a husband and wife, and I hypothesize that these are outward actions of a deeper self-centeredness in one of the two partners.  Selfishness, pride, and ego are all examples of one who is more concerned about themselves than those around them.  This individual offers up no grace or mercy and, in most cases, is not willing to serve the other person’s needs first.

If individuals took the words of the Lord seriously prior to marriage, I propose that their marriage can withstand the trials of this world.  There are 3 levels of relationship: the Spiritual, the Emotional, and the Physical.  At the young age of 20 – 25, most are so drawn to the other by the physical appearance and in most cases, put this ahead of either the emotional or spiritual.  Any relationship that is built on sex, intimacy, and a physical relationship is destined to fail at some point.  There is no substance there to hold it together for the long run, because let’s face it, there will come a time when that attractive, passionate spouse is going to become older and most likely less passionate.  At that point, what is left to provide strength to overcome obstacles in life?

The preferred path of relationship is to develop from a spiritual basis or foundation, evolving into an emotional relationship, and then the realization of a physical relationship after marriage.  This path centers on God and the Holy Spirit as the strength of the relationship, forming the intimacy between the two individuals.  A solid foundation that will last throughout married life between the man and woman shares a core belief in the one true God.  When life’s obstacles, struggles and situations arise the faith that binds these two together is held onto as the armor to defend what God has brought together. 

Furthermore, each individual with a strong relationship with God, through Jesus Christ, enters into the relationship with an attitude of love, mercy, grace, and servitude.  As Christians, we are tasked in becoming more Christlike in our maturing life cycle.  This includes serving others first and thinking of themself second.  This selflessness allows individuals to overcome many of the problems that cause strife in relationships today.  On their wedding day, individuals have no problem promising that they will stay with someone for the rest of their life, through good, bad, sickness, and health; but without the love of God drawing them together and holding them together, it is nearly impossible to remain committed to that promise. 

Love is a precious commodity and can be given or withheld based on our emotional feelings at any given moment. But let me tell you about the woman I was fortunate to marry. Her love is as genuine and unconditional as you will ever find on this planet. She has been gifted with the innate ability to love others through their problems, heartache, and circumstances when others would normally turn away. I am so overwhelmed by the love she has given me for the last 38 years that it is beyond description.  The joy of my marriage to Lisa is that after 38 years, I can still stand before her with love in my heart and state – “I do”.

Be Patient as the Lord is Patient

 “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”  – 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

As those gathered quiet themselves and find their seats, the Minister looks down over the congregation and then directs his eyes to the front row.  Tears are ever present on the delicate cheeks of the woman seated right near the center of the aisle as her husband sits next to her and take her hand in his.  He provides strength and compassion as all eyes focus on the couple at the front of the church.  The Minister opens his bible to 1 Corinthians 13 and begins to recite the all too familiar verse describing the love of the Father.  The soon to be married couple hear some of the words, but the butterflies in their stomach, and the nervousness that they feel take their attention away from his words.  They are focused more on getting through this service and onto the rest of their life together. 

Many of us have been there, standing in the front of the church, all eyes upon us as we recited our vows of love for one another.  The words of Paul the Apostle have become a standard part of most weddings in an attempt to describe the act of loving one another as God has loved us.  This is not a new verse to most of you, but it is a verse that is often times overlooked as we build a marriage relationship centered on the heart of God the Father.  These verses capture the keys to a successful marriage: “Love each other as much as God loves the other person and your marriage will be long and fruitful”

Love is patient and this is absolutely necessary in a marriage.  The other person will have a different and unique personality from you, and you will have to be patient to accept them for who God made them to be.

Love is kind – it all starts with kindness.  In every situation, the first thing we should focus on is kindness and in doing so realize that God is kind to us in all things.  Kindness is highly under-rated when it comes to relationships, yet such a strong power for building trust between two people.

Love does not envy, even when you feel cheated out of something.  God has blessed you and your focus needs to be on being grateful for what you have been given, not what your neighbor may have.
 
Love is not boastful or proud.  We all struggle with pride from time to time.  It is a tool of the evil one to separate individuals from one another and from God.  It requires that one focus their attention on themselves, lifting their qualities up and in doing so, pressing down upon others.  We are all created equal and in God’s eyes there is no hierarchy of importance, therefore there is no room for boasting or being prideful.

Love does not dishonor another individual.  In a marriage, we should be looking for ways to lift up our spouse and bring honor to them through our words and actions.  So often I see spouses pointing out the shortcomings and problems with each other rather than focusing on the positives.  When God looks at any of us, He sees who He made us to be, not who we have become.  When you look upon your spouse, focus on the fact that they are a child of God, and when you speak about them, you are reflecting an image of the Father to those who are listening.

Love is not self-seeking.  Studies have shown that the number one reason for divorce is selfishness.  People in general want happiness and joy for themselves first.  Putting another’s needs ahead of our own is difficult and counter-cultural.  Society has taught us to look out for number one because nobody else is going to.  God teaches us to serve one another and humble ourselves before His throne.  The contradiction is evident and requires a conscious choice in every situation.  When we place our own needs above the needs of the marriage, we are destined to slide down this slippery slope.  This is an area that requires strict attention and work from both members of a marriage.

Love is not angered easily, regardless of the situation.  Controlling ones temper is an example of maturity in the Lord.  During the courtship and dating phase of a relationship it seems so easy to bite your tongue when the other person says or does something wrong.  Something changes, though when we put the wedding band on the finger, as if all of a sudden the individuals are no longer working together, but are against each other.  My wife has a subtle way of reminding me of this when we are having a difference of opinion.  “We are on the same team.”  This little phrase is a quick reminder that the situation is not bigger than the commitment we made to God and to each other.  The “team” consists of the three of us: God, Lisa, and me; and there is no room for fighting amongst the team.

Love keeps not record of wrong-doing.  God forgives and forgets; why then can’t we?  Human nature is generally forgiving, but it is something completely different to forget.  Our memories hold onto those things that cause hurt or pain in our lives as a defense mechanism for the future.  Unfortunately, this hanging on causes the pain to resurface again in the future, long after the actual event has been washed away.  We must learn to let go of the past, for if God has forgotten it, who are we to hold onto it?

These words take all of about 15 seconds to read during the wedding ceremony, but when put to use throughout the marriage, can help sustain, for a lifetime, what God has brought together.  Entering the holiday season, take time to focus your attention on how God loves you in these ways, and how you should be loving your spouse likewise.

Soul Mates

Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’- Matthew 22:37

They were soul mates. She was 14, he was 17 and when they first caught a glimpse of each other across the basketball court, there was a sparkle in their eyes. They were each with someone else that night, but the little bit of harmless flirting that went on would one day be recorded in their memoirs. Years later they walked down the aisle together to begin the tumultuous roller coaster of a life filled with a love from deep within. As the words from the Pastor echoed through the church rafters, "What God has brought together, let no man put asunder" were heard it was taken to heart. Time will pass and these two soul mates will rest on the strength of their love and commitment, and watch their family grow and prosper, all from the comfort of a front porch swing. 

Love between a man and woman will last a lifetime. Certainly, some would argue that a mother's love is stronger than any other, but I propose that a stronger love does not exist than that between husband and wife. It is also the most difficult to put parameters around, until one fathoms the depth of love from God and required of God. You've heard me say a hundred times and I'll keep saying it until the day I die; God cannot love you any more or any less than He does right this minute. Pastor Randy (Harvey) once made the following statement which clearly articulates the love I imagine from God.

"God looked from the beginning of your life and all the way out past it, and said, "There is nothing this boy(girl) will ever do that will keep Me from loving him." 

So, the real question of the scripture is, are we able to love God as much as He loves us? The answer is emphatically, "No." Loving with ALL your heart, soul and mind is impossible with humanity, but that is what God deserves. Why - because that's the way He loves you. God looked down from heaven on the first Good Friday, I suspect with tears, and watched them beat His son, crucify His son, and bury His son. Could God have stopped it? Absolutely, but it would have cost the eternal lives of every other human for all time. All of His heart, All of His mind, and All of His soul were laid open on that day; and God with His infinite love for mankind, swallowed His love for His own son and watched Him die a horrible death. 

Christ prepared a way for us to return that love back to the Father. For Jesus Christ has the capacity to love the Lord with ALL of His heart, His soul and His mind, and only through Him are we able to reciprocate love for the Father, that he deserves. Taking up this scripture and claiming the love of the Father as an entitlement will begin to enrich your desires to love Him back. For as much as you love your husband/wife and children, the love we can give back to God is exponentially greater. Take hold of it my friends. You don't deserve it, but He is giving it to you freely.

Our Savior Had No Home

“Then a teacher of the law came to him and said, “Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go.”  Jesus replied, “Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.” – Matthew 8:19-20 

The summer heat has died down, and the humidity has dissipated and been replaced by the chill in the air often associated with Autumn in the South.  The weather is oftentimes unpredictable as we have all experienced this past year.  Flooding, earthquakes, tsunamis, wildfires, and winter blasts that lasted well into early Spring have impacted many throughout this year.  We watch the news as they describe the devastation brought upon the buildings, businesses, schools, and residential communities after one of these events.  We’ve seen the debris field left behind afterwards and prayed for those that are impacted and we pray for those that have lost family members.  It’s tragic when something like this happens because if you are in the path of one of these storms it can change your life forever.

The ones we seldom hear about though, are the homeless in these circumstances.  What have they lost should a tornado rip through their cardboard community?  Their wealth and their life belongings fit into a box or a shopping cart.  The roof over their head is often a cardboard box if they are lucky enough to find one.  Have you thought about the plight of the homeless during these catastrophic events?

Our Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ was a homeless man for the few years of His ministry.  Sure, His mother and father had a place in Nazareth, but Jesus was seldom in Nazareth after His ministry began.  He called the disciples to “follow Me”.  It wasn’t a request to go on vacation, it was a request to give up their current life and to follow the Messiah, the son of man.  A bold request, that most would spend hours if not days thinking about, before agreeing to.  Jesus called these men away from the comfort of their homes, their families, and their peace of mind.  There were no guarantees, no assurances that He would provide transportation, shelter, or an income.  For these things were not of concern to Jesus Christ.

In towns and villages Jesus, and the disciples, would often stay with one another.  Sometimes it was a friend, sometimes it was a tax collector.  His command to the disciples was to go out among the communities, heal the sick, and cast out demons in His name.  In doing so He instructs them “do not take anything and to stay with others when they come upon a community” (Matthew 10:9-11).  Their nourishment and provisions should not be their concern, for their mission is to spread His grace, love, and salvation.  When they traveled, they looked to the Father for provision, and in doing so became less dependent upon worldly possessions which would only distract them from their calling.

We all become preoccupied with this world and material possessions at times.  When storms roll through and all is lost, it is so easy to fall prey to the evil one and believe that our life indeed is lost because we have nothing.  Take a moment and consider this outlandish idea.  If you did not have a home, car, or a job; all you had were the clothes on your back and shoes on your feet; what would you do for God?  Would you travel from city to city spreading His good news?  Would you look for shelter from a stranger and then share the gospel with them?  I have heard a story of a young man, successful by the world’s standards, who gave up everything to travel America and hand out bibles.  He moves from city to city, begging and working for his keep, and in the process asking for folks to donate bibles, which he gives away to those in need.  This is a modern-day example of what Jesus Christ was asking His disciples to do.  It seems far-fetched and counterintuitive when looked at from the world’s perspective.  Yet, he is not concerned about losing everything to floods, tornados, hurricanes, or wildfires. 

It’s a strange thought I know, but it’s one that we all must face at one point or another – What worldly possession is separating me from truly serving the Lord?  I think about this and often shutter at my answer, for it is worldly by nature.

Trust in His Plan

 “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the Lord.  - Jeremiah 29:11-14

Israel was in captivity in Babylon when this prophecy was given. They felt forgotten, abandoned, and as though all the promises of God they once believed were gone due to their sin and disobedience. And they thought they knew what God thought about them. His “thoughts” must not be good towards them because their current circumstances were so bad. This is why God says, “I know my thoughts. They are not what you think. My thoughts and plans for you are good. I’ve not forgotten you.”

‘Does God love me?”
“If God knew what I have done, there is no way He could love me.”

How many people have you heard say something of this nature?  It is so common for people to eliminate themselves from God’s grace and blessing because of their past actions.  Repeat sinful actions, turning away from God, anger with God, painful experiences in life – these are all things that will cause individuals to discount their place in God’s kingdom and plans.  We all believe that we can know the thoughts of the Lord, and know His ways.  This is impossible, for He is not of this world and our mind is so infinitely small, His glory and ways are incomprehensible for us.  What these folks need to understand is that God is a God of love, an eternal love that cannot be diminished, be eliminated or withdrawn. 

 

God has provided eternal salvation for all mankind.  I have often seen the Hebrew interpretation of the word “all” is ….. (wait for it) ALL.  Yes, even you.  You see, when Jesus Christ carried that cross through the stone streets of Jerusalem, he wasn’t choosing which people of all time He would be dying for.  He was fulfilling God’s plan of salvation through one sacrificial act.  His blood was shed, just like the sacrificial lambs in the historical Jewish customs, for the forgiveness of sin.  He was crucified and died on that hill so that mankind’s sins would be atoned for.  He was buried and rose again, so we could become the redeemer for all of mankind from that day forward.  Today, He is alive and seated next to the right hand of God, appealing on your behalf for every sinful act you have lived through.  It is not a game of scale, because if His blood sacrifice is not sufficient for one sin (regardless of how heinous) it is not sufficient for any of our sins, regardless of how small.

So, what have you done that disqualifies you?  Do you really believe that God has turned His back on you and no longer wants you in His eternal kingdom?  Please take a deep breath and pray on this.  I am here tonight to tell you, God has not turned from you, and His love is no different today than it was the day you born.  You are His child and He cannot love you more, nor can He love you less than He did on that day.  You see God’s love is immutable, never changing.  His demands are high (as we discussed yesterday) and He wants for you to love and worship Him.  The one requirement is to believe in His son – Jesus Christ – as your personal Savior and Lord, repent of your sinful actions and turn to follow Him.  Your eternal peace is within your reach, just grab the Father’s hand.

The Other 50 Weeks of the Year

 “I’m going out to fish,” Simon Peter told them, and they said, “We’ll go with you.” So they went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing." – John 21:3

It is so easy to drift back to the area of comfort and security in life. Each year, for 2 weeks we celebrate Good Friday and Resurrection Sunday, and many of us are focused on the most important event in the Christian church – the death, burial, and resurrection of our Lord – Jesus Christ. What a glorious event to celebrate and take hold of, for through belief and faith in this we find redemption and salvation and enter into His grace. The problem I have seen, though, is that life can immediately overwhelm us the rest of the year if we are not careful and mindful of His presence.

Peter and the other disciples, having observed the crucifixion of their Lord and Savior and having seen the empty tomb, come to the shore ready to get back to work. I must believe that the events they had just lived through left them somewhat confused and uncertain about what lay ahead. These men were fishermen before Christ had called them “Follow Me”, and therefore it was in their blood. The last few years had been filled with learning from the Master, fellowshipping with Him daily and never worrying about where their provisions might come from. Consider, that in no circumstance does the scriptures discuss how the disciples made a living over that period of walking with the Lord. Yet, we see multiple times when Jesus met their needs for food, nourishment, and a place for rest. It must have come to the disciples that after His death, they must get back to their work once again to put food on their table and make a livelihood for themselves.

Secondly, I believe they must have been saddened and felt somewhat abandoned by the death of their Master, their friend. In Zechariah (13:7) it speaks of striking the shepherd and the sheep will be scattered. The disciples of Jesus Christ on the eve of His crucifixion were scattered amongst the hills of Jerusalem. Each his separate way, lost, abandoned, and feeling helpless against the Romans and the powerful leaders of the Jewish nation at that time. Peter more so than others, for he had sworn to Jesus that he would not turn away from his Lord but would fight to the death. Now, here he was after seeing his Savior beaten, scourged, crucified, buried, and resurrected; feeling ashamed for his inability to stand up for Jesus Christ when confronted.

Finally, as they pursued their livelihood in the manner that was second nature to all of them, they caught nothing. These men had been fishermen before Christ called them. It was in their blood, and they had learned the trait for years before His ministry in their life. They knew how to fish and provide for their families. Yet, here we read of their adventure on the open water coming up empty, completely void of any catch whatsoever. Not a single fish is harvested from their efforts doing what they knew how to do. In the following verses though (John 21:5-6) Jesus calls to them and tells them to cast their nets on the right side of the boat. Following His instructions, they haul in an extraordinarily large harvest of fish. It is then that they realize that it is Jesus upon the shore calling to them.

Here we find man trying to do it his way and coming up empty and an abundance when we listen to the righteous way of the Lord. We also see that even post-death and resurrection, Jesus Christ is taking care of the needs of His sheep as we are seeking His work in our lives. It is not known why the scriptures mention casting the net to the right side of the boat, but one may interpret that to mean the righteousness of God. For when we are working within His righteousness, as fishermen of souls the harvest will be plentiful. When we are working within our own ways and the ways of the world, we will come up empty. The ways of the Lord are given to us through His word. The scriptures are the teachings and directions for our life, and when we apply these in our daily walk with God, the impact on the world is tremendous, larger than we could have ever imagined.

Just because it's not Easter does not mean we are to fall back to the worldly ways of life. No far be it from us to try to take on this life alone, within our own means. God has provided for us a path to righteousness and His word as a tool for expanding His kingdom on this earth. It is easy to become complacent and habitual about our life plans, but I implore you to break out of that mold and cast your nets with the righteousness of the Lord and His word. In doing so, He will use you to bring real change into this world, change with an eternal impact.

YOU ARE BLESSED

 “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.“ – Philippians 4:12

Most of us could quote the verse immediately after this one without opening the cover of our bible.  I’ll give you a hint; it starts with “I can do all... “ 

That’s right; “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” {Phil 4:13}  It’s important to realize why Paul the Apostle was saying this.  It is not a verse to stand alone, no, it is the conclusion to his statement above in Phil 4:12. 

Are you blessed?  Do you consider that God has blessed you in this life?  What happens when you don’t receive the blessing you feel you deserve?  Was there ever a promise in the scriptures that says your life will be easier by following God?  It’s interesting to contemplate who we think God is, and just what He owes us.

More and more, I see people blame God when things go wrong, and analyze until they’re blue in the face why God didn’t do this or didn’t fix that.  Is that who we believe God to be?  The one to fix our problems and get us out of situations that our actions have gotten us into?  Let’s look at the examples we have from scripture:

David – murdered the husband of the woman he had an affair with after discovering that she was pregnant with his child……God help me

Moses – From the luxuries of Pharaoh’s palace to the desolation of Mount Horeb as a shepherd after killing an Egyptian in defense of an Israelite slave who was being beaten at the time …… Why God?

Moses – Never enters Canaan after leading the Israelites out of Egypt and wandering in the desert for 40 years ….. What are you doing, God?

Job – A favored child of God, a man who lived by the law and did no wrong; lost his family, his possessions, his house, and his health at the hand of Satan, with the full blessing of God the Father….. Why me, God?

Matthew – born Levi, studying the scripture to be a Pharisee or Priest, turned from his heritage and God, for an unknown reason, to become a tax collector for Rome ….. I turn my back on you, God

Paul – Educated at University to be a Pharisee, highly exalted amongst his Jewish peers, destined for a life of luxury.  Then salvation and hardship - shipwrecked, beaten near death, imprisoned multiple times, life threatened time and time again, and in the end died at the hand of the Romans for his faith…. To serve God is my blessing

Just a few examples of the men we find in scripture that we hold up as our mentors and our examples.  Each struggled mightily in life, and it is my belief that they were much closer in their walk with God than I will ever be.  Am I truly that entitled to a life of no hardship, no struggles, and no grief simply because I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior and Lord?

God gave me salvation through His Son Jesus Christ.  He owes me nothing more.  My life is a representation of His love for mankind, if I choose to use it for that purpose.  Even then, I am not promised a life with no struggle, no heartache, and no pain.  Yet, I choose to remain faithful through it all, trusting that God is Sovereign and is in control.  I don’t need to understand it, I just need to trust that I am His child, born again, and will one day lay my head upon His lap in peace.  Until then, it is my job to wake up each day and praise Him, regardless of my circumstances. 

God doesn’t leave your side when you are struggling, hurting, or in need.  He doesn’t abandon you, and He isn’t punishing you by allowing these things.  I do not believe God exists to make my life comfortable and to ensure that I am happy.  I exist for Him, not the other way around.  I am not entitled to anything in life; everything I have is more than I deserve because when it all comes down to it, I deserve to go to Hell.  God has already given me more than I could or should ever want, and that is eternal life in Heaven with Him and Jesus Christ.  I am very Blessed indeed.